How do you come across to others?

Do you know how and does it matter?  Yes, it does.  It makes you influential or not, to get your needs met or not and to be happy and fulfilled because your relationships matter.

Today, at networking I didn’t come over well enough.  How did I know?  Feedback was one, body language and the silence at the end the other. But why?

I spoke to much and it was by rote, not natural (I wanted to practice the pitch for my business rather than introducing myself and my business).  Feedback is good – not criticism but helpful insight into what I can do differently, how I can behave differently.

Ways you can get that feedback include:

  1. Asking people how you come across to them.  Can be difficult and uncomfortable but worthwhile!
  2. Watch the response and trust your instincts to read how people felt (body language, facial expressions)
  3. Assess the impact you had on people (the silence, response)
  4. Video yourself and change what you don’t like but remember we rarely like our voice, look when we see it
  5. Write to people asking for feedback on specific things like confidence, impression, image, voice, content, behaviours, attitude etc.
  6. Listen to what is reflected to you from others – people often share with you some feedback if you listen for it

Your personal or business image, your professional role image, has a lot of influence for better or w orse.

Quietly spoken, shy, or shrinking into the background (ground swallowing you in public events!) comes across as lacking confidence in what you say – and what you know.   Listen to yourself, and other people, as to what you want to change and would change about them and compare yourself to see if something can be improved.

There is always room for improvement in some aspects of your life, your behaviours.  We are constantly learning and growing, therefore changing and developing new needs and new ways of being you.