Achievements

So how did I find my dream?   When I was a teenager for some reason I wanted to have a blue Rolls Royce!  Sky blue – yes!   Why?  Looking back I guess the question was: “Why not?”

I would still like the Rolls but not in blue, at least not sky blue this time!  Will I get it? Who knows!   I should say a resounding: “YES!” because I’m a life coach should I?   Well, there may be other things I find I want more as I continue through life, so for now ‘who knows’ will do for me!

Blue rolls

Picture of Caribbean blue Rolls Royce as screenshot from this blog  for more details, or click on the picture

It actually looks quite good in blue after all …!

 

So what did the Rolls Royce represent for me then (and now)?

It represented achievement; it was about showing the world what I had managed to get? (Maybe a little); it was about my reward for my hard work? (yes); it was then the highest accolade  my limited mind could conjure for achievement – for having go the life I wanted I think.

Now, today?   Well, I have achieved.  Things I didn’t even then know I wanted or could achieve, that even existed!  I didn’t think so far ahead as to HOW I would get what I got or what I really wanted (other than the Rolls…).

So,

  • Practical achievements – social norms and measurements perhaps…
  • Emotional achievements – huge for me personally and very subjective!
  • Psychological achievements – even more subjective for me and most others!
  • Financial – not so much…(yet!)
  • Physical – enough and more than many…
  • Progress through life and living – lots!
  • Procreation  – yes, two children, counselling, coaching and supporting people!
  • I have a good standard of education having taken several adult training courses at evening classes, any training through work as well as reading and researching  – I have a natural curiosity, so I love to learn!
  • I have started and run a business which I continue to develop
  • I have two beautiful, interesting, talented daughters who are good women …
  • I have solid personal values, conscious beliefs, self-awareness of who I am, can be and want to be…

What today would – or does – represent my achievements, my ‘having made it’?

Well, travel is the one – for this year!    This is my celebration, my hard earned reward and my accolade to my own achievements.   They may not be for everyone, and they may not impress everyone (or anyone!) but that’s OK because they are MY achievements!

When I work with clients around (re)building self-esteem, and confidence (they are different but related …sort of) I use achievements as one of the tools, and a key point in starting on a personal coaching process too.

It causes immediate anxiety, but sometimes just a minimal tension to ‘get it right’, yet for others more tension in ‘what counts as achievements (in coaching)?  And more anxiety for those who have quite low self esteem in that they have NO achievements!   But of course -they do.   Just because no-one has reflected them back to them or hasn’t acknowledged them to them, or has taken away the achievement from them in some way doesn’t mean they haven’t achieved!   Indeed, to breath, get out of bed, open our eyes, ears or mouth each day is an achievement – but more than that, it’s what you did that day that is your achievement!  And mine!

Even ‘successful’ professionals I have worked with or even just met and talked to, feel they have no real achievements.  But that’s because an achievement is very subjective and it should not really be a social decision, a society reflecting back what a few people do that the majority then see as an ‘ achievement’.  By this the obvious ones are money, big business, charitable acts of kindness, above and beyond the call of duty or ‘normal’ expectations (and therein lies another discussion on it’s own – ‘normal’ means what and to whom?)

 Achievement...